Workshop Titles & Descriptions 







From Hurting to Healing: Opened Hearts, Crossed Boundaries

Creating a stable and ethical non-monogamous relationship requires open communication, honesty, and trust. Mistakes can happen along the way, no matter how well-intentioned and experienced you may be. Boundaries are crossed, agreements are broken, and we have to decide how to heal and if we will stay in the relationship or not. Together we will explore ways to address common mistakes in non-monogamous relationships.

How to Be a Polyamorous Ally

Polyamory is still considered taboo and without allies to support consensual nonmonogamy, lovers will remain ostracized and unfairly treated. 

Sex Therapy with Polyamorous Clients

Polyamorous clients might be reluctant to seek sex therapy because of stereotype threat, stigma, and lack of competent providers. In this presentation, I will address what to expect from a sex therapist, and, if you are a sex therapist, key competencies for working with polyamorous clients will be highlighted.

Rewriting the Rules of Our Relationship Patterns (to Change the World)

This sessions covers relationship patterns: how these develop from the cultural rules around us and from our own life experiences, how we can notice and understand them and their impact, and how it might be possible to shift them through various practices. We'll also reflect on why this is vital work to do in our communities and the wider world given current conversations about consent, power, and the unequal valuing of different bodies and labor.

Raising Kids in a Polyamorous Home

Polyamory with kids! How do you tell your children? WHAT do you tell your children? How do you help your children as they explore their own relationship styles? We’ll discuss these and other topics concerning raising children in a polyamorous household.

Transitioning from Monogamy to Nonmonogamy

Breaking down monogamous conditioning and ways of relating is essential in the process of transitioning from monogamy to ethical non-monogamy and polyamory. We will explore some of those monogamous assumptions we carry into non-monogamy as we are opening up and what thoughts and practices to replace them with to enjoy a healthy and happy non-monogamous experience.

Let's Learn From Meg-John Barker, PhD, about relationships! Title is linked to a YouTube video.

The Art of Contracts, Agreements, and Negotiation

Let's face it: relationships are difficult and confusing. Now add more people (yes!) and maybe even power dynamics (double yes!), and there's so much room for confusion, hurt/pain (not the good kind), and broken expectations. All of this can be alleviated with relationship contracts. Join us as we explore relationship dynamics and how they can be drastically improved with a contract. 

Young, Black, Same Gender Loving, and an Ethical Slut

Description coming soon.

"I love you but you need to take yo’ ass home.” Boundary Formation, Maintenance, and Severance in Polyamorous Relationships

In some poly relationships, individuals have difficulty clarifying and articulating emotional, behavioral, time, and spatial boundaries with partners and thus find themselves in circumstances that become dysfunctional and sometimes toxic. When boundaries, expectations, and rules (e.g., implicit and explicit) aren’t discussed up front and consistently throughout the relationship, the emergent assumptions may ultimately be catalysts for hurt and possibly trauma.

This presentation will discuss strategies for developing clarity around boundaries and how they are negotiated across time, context, and circumstance in polyamorous relationships. The presentation assumes that change is inevitable in poly relationships and invites participants to recognize and affirm the reality of individual, relational, and systemic change that may suggest that “I love you, but you need to take yo’ ass home.”

Young, Black, and Polyamorous

Description Coming Soon

Como hablarle a los niños sobre sexo (Talking to your kids about sex)

Description Coming Soon

Galletas y Consentimiento (Cookies & Consent)

Description Coming Soon

Raising Children in a Sex Positive & Polyamorous Family

Raising children can be challenging and wonderful all at the same time. Raising kids in a polyamorous family while in a wider mono-centric world can bring a unique set of issues. Issues can be further complicated in our sex negative culture. How can we pass positive messages to our kids on sexuality, love, relationships, orientation and gender? Building trust and a strong foundation with our children is important in their development into well-adjusted adults.


This open discussion we will talk about the challenges faced by polyamorous parents. Polyamorous families can face challenges with time management and finding balance between romantic partners, work and childcare. How can we be true to ourselves and support our children in the broader world? We will discuss how to talk to kids about sex, polyamory, bisexuality, and other sometimes challenging subjects as well as helping children through unforeseen crisis. Please bring your questions and experiences.

The Benefits of Being a Kinky Therapist

You’ve found both a career you love and a fulfilling sexual expression. And yet, there are unique challenges in being a therapist who is informed by alternative sexual identity/expression AND creating space for one’s own sex life. For the kinky, non-monogamous professionals, we will explore using your sexual identity and expression as a tool for creating safety, aligning with your client, and creating new paradigms of healing. Let’s examine the antiquated idea that therapists must be de-sexualized and find new ways of honoring every person's sexuality. Topics include balancing multiple roles, marketing, creating clear ethical boundaries, and maximizing your effectiveness.

Micro-Aggressions of Desire

Micro-Aggressions and the Implicit Bias and Confirmation Bias resting just below (whether self-inflicted or experienced from others) have a disturbingly strong impact on the realization of one’s desire. All three entities can lead us to deny, diminish, and delete our desires. It is essential that a light be shone on the corners in which Micro-Aggressions, Implicit Bias and Confirmation Bias hide, exposing them to our consciousness. From that place they can be fully addressed and eliminated or dealt with.

Living Non-Monogamous, Fat and Differently Abled

Embracing and living as our true selves is often a blessing and a struggle that can affect every relationship we are in whether familial, romantic or as friends. In this panel discussion, the panelists will share how the intersection of non-monogamy, the fat acceptance movement, and living with being differently abled affects their lives through both blessings and struggles and how they have learned to embrace both sides and live as their true selves. 

Best and Worst Practices of Poly Men (Attracted to Women)

Men in the polyamorous or sex party scenes sometimes do great — and other times they screw up mightily!  This class, focused on nonmonogamous men attracted to women, will cover many of men's good habits — or bad moves — that Pepper has seen again and again in the local scenes. Learn how to avoid common mistakes and the shifts in the thinking that will help you get along and get up to dating. Much of the material will be drawn from Pepper's new book: Playing Fair. While the class is aimed at men attracted to women, all are welcome.

Love's Not Color Blind: The Intersection of Race & Polyamory

While polyamory and polyamorists are often viewed as welcoming, far too often our communities and representation appear very limited. While we can be outspoken when it comes to feminism and LGBT issues, sometimes we are suspiciously silent in regards to race. Beyond that, we sometimes foster a standoffish, stressful, or downright unwelcoming atmosphere around people of color. This is a discussion about why diversity is important to our movement. We will tackle ways we can promote inclusive environments in our lives, in our communities, and at our events. 


Everyone understands that good boundaries are important to be happy, healthy, and wise (so we think); but what are boundaries? Are they just asking what you want from someone? Are they demanding apologies when someone hurts you? We will find out what healthy boundaries are. What types of people commit boundary violations. And lastly how to enact appropriate boundaries. “What is an amazing home if someone continues to trample your flowers and do donuts in your yard?!?!”

Deconstructing the Myth of Poly Sainthood

In the poly community, there are concepts that have become qualifications for "poly sainthood": always feeling compersion and never jealousy, always being available but never needy, always communicating but never having drama, etc. This is the model that poly newbies are told to emulate, that those who are struggling are judged against, and that many feel guilty for not living up to. In this workshop, we will explore the origins of these ideas, identify how they are presented in media and online, discuss the impact on relationships and self-concept, and ask: what does it mean to be "good at" polyamory? 

Active Loving

Active Loving is a 2 part workshop on how to be a better active participant in your relationships. What that looks like, how to discuss it with your partners, and techniques to use to make the most of every relationship you are in. With Part 1 consisting of classroom discussion and group conversation and part 2 being a worksheet and practical application session. (Must attend Part one to take part 2) Participants will learn new ways to understand and communicate their needs and wants, as well as how to support their partners journey to get their needs and wants met.

Illness, Me, and Polyamory Makes Three (or more)

The three presenters are all sexuality educators living with various chronic illnesses/chronic pain conditions and have experience with non-monogamy. Journal articles, medical research, and sexual education information will be utilized in order to present some of the medical information. Information will be presented verbally with the assistance of visuals and observed conversations. Ideas presented will include: health conditions, communicating with partner(s), lack of a focus on sexual pleasure with health care providers, coming out as polyam, toys and exercises that are potentially helpful for those with pain, safer sex considerations, and solutions for various problems presented.

The Bystander Affect: Asking for support from your lovers and community

The "bystander effect" is a social psychological phenomenon that suggests that the more people there are around, the less likely someone is to help. While you might think having more lovers and friends would increase the level of support people feel, sometimes the bystander effect comes into play. This workshop will explore how to assert your needs and ask directly for help and support so as to ensure you feel more supported with more people around rather than less.

Couples Going from Monogamy to Non-Monogamy

As many of us know, being poly in a monogamous world has its ups and downs, but taking on the process of going from monogamy to non-monogamy as a couple can have its own unique set of difficulties, as well as gifts. In this session we will explore five specific dynamics and challenges that relate to couples trying to transition from mono to poly while staying together.

In this workshop you will go beyond talking about relationship agreements, communication and jealousy, through exploring:

  • How the paradigm shift your are going through is creating your relationship challenges, not non-monogamy.

  • How the skills you used to stay healthy in monogamy may not convert in poly. 

  • Why the pairing of a Poly-as-Lifestyle partner with a Poly-as-Orientation partner can be particularly challenging. 

  • How going Poly can catalyze an awakening of the Authentic Self

  • And How going Poly can expose a Crisis of Attachment Style. 

"It's Called Polyamory" Coming Out About Your Nonmonogamous Relationships

Polyamory is a love style that is only now beginning to become visible to the society at large; however we continue to face significant discrimination. In order to change this, people who have a non-monogamous identity need to come out. This roundtable will discuss advantages and disadvantages of coming out in various settings. I will exchange stories and give advice on what to say and what not to say when coming out to others. This session will help support individuals in all stages of their coming out journey.

Writing Our Own Scripts: Dispelling Normativity to Create Possibility

Do you find yourself struggling to undo the mainstream, monogamous cultural expectations even when your relationships are anything but normative? Breaking away from society's script of how we should do things is never easy. It's especially tricky if we never have a chance to examine carefully the unspoken expectations we're all facing.

In this session, we'll take a close look at what it means to go “off script” and how those choices have worked and failed in our variety of experiences. Expect real talk about what surprised, delighted, and frustrated us, where we still feel constrained, and our future hopes.

Friend of the Family: Loss and Disenfranchised Grief in Polyamorous Families

When people in polyamorous relationships experience loss, their pain is often complicated by disenfranchised grief, or grief where the socially-sanctioned "space" for grief is limited or absent. In this workshop, we'll examine the following:

  1. What is disenfranchised grief, and what are some factors associated with disenfranchisement?

  2. How can the concept of disenfranchised grief be applied to people in polyamorous relationships and/or families?

  3. What kinds of clinical strategies might be useful in dealing with disenfranchised grief in these situations?


My plan is for the workshop to be interactive and dynamic and to make use of our shared experiences.

Do These Models Make My Relationship(s) Look Big? Building a Model of Nonmonogamous Relationship Therapy Using Couples Therapy, Family Therapy, and Other Systems Theory

What's this item about? Frustrated by the couple-centric focus of most models of relationship therapy? In this workshop, Dr. Hensley will outline a (very) preliminary model of relationship therapy that (1) is appropriate for use with polyamorous relationships/families, (2) can lead to effective treatment planning specific to the needs of these clients, and (3) addresses power dynamics, privilege, oppression, and other larger systemic issues which impact families and the individuals within them. The goal of this presentation is not to present a finished model, but rather to begin a conversation. 

The Open Photo Project: Sharing the Lives of Consensually Non-Monogamous People through Photography

The Open Photo Project uses photos, audio, and text to share the stories of consensually non-monogamous people. This workshop will be a screening of select stories from the project and a Q&A with creator/photographer, Erika Kapin. Audio from the interviews of all the participants will play on speakers while the photos of their lives play in a slideshow. A discussion on behind-the-scenes of the project’s creation as well as inspirations will follow the screening.

Autoethnographic Explorations in Poly-Mono Relationships: The Good, The Bad, The Beautiful, and The Ugly

Love isn't the work of the tender and the gentle; Love is the work of wrestlers. —Rumi


My partner and I are both anthropologists and intimately familiar with the discourse and research with regard to mono-poly relationships.  We adhere to different relationship styles. He is polyamorous and I am monogamous. This interactive workshop, using autoethnographic research, intimately explores poly-mono relationships, paying particular attention to interracial relationship dynamics. We openly discuss the potential perils and pitfalls as well as the beauty and benefits of an often controversial, contested, and contentious relationship dynamic. We will provide workable solutions for relationship success.

Re-Wire Your Triggers

We all experience moments where the intensity of our reactions seems out of proportion and our better selves get eclipsed by the body’s fight/fight/freeze defense systems taking over. Unfortunately, being in reactivity can stand in the way of creating the life and love you want. It can ruin relationships, break up families, and at times make non-monogamy seem nearly impossible to traverse. However, your triggers can be rewired and transformed! And working with your triggers can actually become a catalyst for deep healing, growth, and more fulfilling relationships.

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